Aware of Receiving

My friend and I met at writer’s camp fifteen years ago. Since then I stop by her home in Salem Oregon for several days when I’m on the road to catch up and talk writing together.

I share with my friend the idea of a novel I want to create that has been actively brewing inside of me. I have been a writer, actively producing now for three decades. Yet I have never written a fiction novel and I am being called into it. My friend likes and is supportive of my idea and we talk about it on our drive earlier in the day down the coast. Now it is my first night in a bed I have slept in many times. Then wide awake at 2:12 am. I have been given a character.

God often wakes me up between 2 and 3 am and is known to keep me up for hours. This is when I am given direction, next steps for my life, have a lively conversation with The Invisible, pray, or experience direct healing. This morning/night I am given my first character. I knew there was a creative well that gave forth, yet this was my first experience drinking from it. And, my character…I love her. I learn her name, her age, her occupation, where she fits in the story which is also being given to me as I listen to its unfoldment within. I roll out of bed, quite tired, and grab my writing journal. I collect all of the characteristics I am given and then I crawl back in bed. I tell Universal Intelligence or Creative Mind that I am okay with being woken up but It must work with me to go back to sleep. It takes me hours before I snooze again.

And, I am excited. Many, many years ago when I was engaging in Abundance practices I became keenly aware that EVERYTHING is given to me. This is a humble way to live. My intelligence, creativity, friends whose paths I cross, ideas, comfort…EVERYTHING is made available to me through a Loving Divine Intelligence that can’t help Itself. It simply loves, as It is Love. Now the difficult part is mine. It is to see it, accept it, and recognize the blessing. This way of being in the world is NOT taught and can seem crazy to those outside looking in. Yes, I have to cultivate and craft. Yes, I have to show up. Yes, I have to put time in. I am instrumental in all of this. But THIS only exists because there is a Benevolence that loves and gives and I KNOW IT. So I receive. With my pen and journal in hand I receive.

I meet my friend in her dining room for breakfast in the morning and I spill the beans. I share everything I know about my character and she too loves her. I tell her she’s from Oregon and attended a private hippy type college. I learn it is Reed. Then I have her living in McMinnville so we venture to the small town for the day so I can walk the streets and feel into the people.

I never want to return to the old, trained way of thinking that I am the doer. It is heavy, unenchanted, and lacks imagination. I begin my day today grateful that I am alive, that I am aware, and that I have received.